Tag Archives: running

Elliptical Goddess for a Gym God?

16 Jan

Middle-Aged Male Gym Goer: You spend way too long on that thing [elliptical].

Penny: I’m sorry, what?

MAMGG: Every day I tell myself, “You’re going to keep up with her today.” And every day you just keep going.

Penny: Oh, uhhhh, well <<flashes New Yorker>> it really helps to have a magazine?

MAMGG, if only you knew that every day I say to myself: Penny, if you get off this machine before that grey-haired man I will lose all respect for you and tell you so constantly in a repeating thought pattern until you fall asleep.

Thank you, A*Teens

24 Oct

For your wonderfully awful 2001 album Teen Spirit.

For helping me ignore that freezing sting in my lungs while I finish up the third mile of my morning run.

For making me forget that November is happening soon.

For the terrified stares I got from the kids in my neighborhood waiting for the schoolbus, watching me lipsync to “Halfway Around the World” like my life depended on it.

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