Downton Abbey US Season Premiere, An Acrostic Review

7 Jan

Penny and Circe’s reaction (via text) to the US premiere of Downton Abbey, series 3, can be summed up in the following three bullets:

  • OMFG MATTHEW. So hot.
  • OMFG BRANSON. So hot.
  • Fuck Bates. I wish he’d been hanged by the neck until dead.

Or, at least, that’s their iMessage history.

Oh, also…

  • WHAT are they all WEARING? That is the WORST wedding dress EVER. Perhaps our troubles finding things to wear to this upcoming alumni event can be laid squarely at Downton’s double doors. Sacks. Shapeless sacks. All of it.

And now for the morning after…

Penny:  Honestly? My first reaction is “Damn. The How I Met Your Mother Christmas episode has ruined me for all other television this year”.

Circe: I mean it obviously wasn’t on par with that episode, but I was still pleased.

"You won't be happy with anyone else so long as Lady Mary walks the earth."

A bromance of which we wholeheartedly approve.

Downsizing looks to be the name of the game in the face
Of financial ruin
When Matthew fortuitously learns of an unexpected inheritance,
Not, mind you, that his middle class scruples would allow him to accept
The money that could save Downton.
Oh, don’t be such a disappointment, Matthew.”
No one cared that much about Lavinia, anyway.

Although Shirley MacLaine is a welcome foil,
Bedeviling the Dowager Countess,
Branson (Excuse me, Tom) steals the show as outsider du jour; he
Embodies his proletarian convictions much more believably than the
Yapping, brash, mannerless American outsider who spouts off endlessly with visions of progress grand enough to match her disdain for tradition.

Speaking of Branson, there’s a budding bromance of which we wholeheartedly approve. And is
3 soon to be the number of brothers-in-law?

Even downstairs, the push for progress is felt as Thomas terrorizes the new staff and Daisy sulks at her continued non-status.
1 is the number of shits we give about Bates… plus 1


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