Things you miss when you don’t take public transit

12 Nov

As we mentioned last week, this past weekend was a bit of a P&P reunion/whirlwind 2 .5 days during which Penny met [most of] Polly’s peeps.

Getting around [POLLY’S CITY] is best done via public transit. Below is a transcription of our adventures on the same. Enjoy. (We certainly did.)

Saturday, early afternoon. The train is full and P&P are forced to separate. Text messages inevitably ensue.

Polly: Can we observe bro cracking a beer before 1 sitting across from retired school teachers.

Penny: Ok… I’ll be obvious and turn around… HAHAHAHAHHAA. And sitting next to his super entitled, annoying wife? With the cappuccino machine because she did the math and realized how much money she was wasting on Starbucks where the stupid, uneducated baristas just mess up her complicated order anyway and are they sure they don’t have any almond milk?

Polly: If I had a better phone, I’d snag a picture of his shoes.

Penny: HAHAHHA OMZ. Those are not shoes. Those are Foot Candy for Men. (And I am at the wrong angle to do so unobtrusively. Sigh.)

Polly: It’s so inspiring! HOLY SHIT did you hear social security might run out? MY TEACHER SAID SO.

Penny: Social security is going bankrupt? Whatever, I have lavender shoes and coordinating purple polk-a-dot socks.

Polly: I’m too hung over for this shit. Should have insisted we brunch first.

Penny: I wear my sunglasses when it’s cloudy (because the glare from my wife’s huge rock is too much for my poor sensitive eyes to bear) / And press my blue button-downs for Saturday trips into the city.

Polly: The lesser-known 80s hit.

Polly: I SAW YOU LOOK.

Penny: YOU KNOW YOU LOVE ME BECAUSE LOOK WHAT I GOT A PICTURE OF:

Still Saturday, much later after many cocktails and all the cheese. Unexpected wisdom.

Random Child on the Train: “I want some M&Ms.”
Penny: “Me too, kid. Me, too.”

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