“Hey.” And other texts that won’t be answered.

16 Aug

So I guess when you step a little outside the comfort zone that is your pillow-topped bed and 5 more seasons of Buffy to get through, there’s a chance you might encounter other life forms. And sometimes these life forms are really terrible at first impressions.

Saturday, 8-11

1:30 AM Law Student Whose Name Escapes Me: Wow, you’re mad pretty. It was really nice meeting you :)
3:45 PM LSWNEM: Hope you got home ok last night.
4:00 PM Polly: I did, thanks for asking!

Polly: I met some law student at a bar last night… I was fairly intoxicated but I’m pretty sure he was nice.
Penny: Well, why not go on a date and find out?!

8:30 PM LSWNEM: What are you up to tonight?
8:47 PM Polly: Seeing a play with some friends from school.
8:48 PM LSWNEM: What are you doing after?
9:17 PM Polly: We’re probably going to a bar in the area. I haven’t seen them for a while so there is much catching up to do.
9:20 PM LSWNEM: Damn, I would have really liked to see you :)

Sunday, 8-12

9:30 PM LSWNEM: What were you up to today?
9:45 PM Polly: Running errands.

Monday, 8-13

10:45 PM LSWNEM: Hey

Polly: Ugh, he’s the type who texts “hey” and expects a response.
Penny: No. Texts after 10pm are immediate family and best friends only. And dear Zeus have something to say. 

Tuesday, 8-14

8:10 PM LSWNEM: I kinda started to like you when we met… weird :/ You’re so different from other girls I’ve met in the city.

Polly: WHAT IS THAT FACE? WHAT COULD THAT FACE POSSIBLY MEAN? WHAT, IT’S WEIRD FOR SOMEONE TO LIKE ME? NEWSFLASH, BROSEPH, I’M UTTERLY LIKABLE.
Penny: No words. 

10:30 PM LSWNEM: I hope I didn’t scare you off when I said I liked you…

Wednesday, 8-15

7:25 LSWNEM: Hey
8:05 LSWNEM: What happened to you, Polly?
10:45 PM Polly: Ok, here’s the thing: I hardly know you. We met at a bar and I honestly didn’t even catch your name. You seemed very nice and personable, but texting “hey” late at night isn’t going to get you anywhere and leaves a poor impression. If you wanted to get to know me as a person you might have asked me to dinner, maybe? But the fact that I’m explaining this seems like a red flag. I’m not interested in being a bootycall if that’s what you’re looking for.

Molly: Way to go, Pol!

10:50 Persy: I texted “hey” because I didn’t want to lose touch with you. And I thought I did ask you out. My name is Persy, by the way. Persy Poor-Firstimpression. You can find me on facebook. No need to flip out, you’re too pretty to be just a call :)

Molly: That’s… kind of sweet!

Well, readers? What do you think?

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One Response to ““Hey.” And other texts that won’t be answered.”

  1. Sotorya (Tory) August 30, 2012 at 10:08 pm #

    I think that you should be focusing on 2 and a half more seasons of Being Erica, 6 seasons of Doctor Who, 2 seasons of Pushing Daisies, 2 seasons of Dark Angel, 4 Seasons of Secret Diary of a all Girl, and 9 seasons of One Tree Hill before you get back to Buffy.

    Also. Creep Meter is off the scale with this guy in my brain.

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